Here’s something I’ve noticed after three weeks’ sleepless sampling of basic cable TV fare:

  • The 3-6AM lineup is sponsored by infomercials for stock trading, investment scams, and exercise machines.
  • The morning news hour is sponsored by erectile dysfunction, male enhancement, and the automotive industry.
  • Game shows are propped up by personal injury lawyers and the diet/fitness industry.
  • Noon news hour and the early afternoon lineup are paid for by personal injury lawyers and weight loss pills.
  • 3PM is owned, of course, by Oprah.
  • 4PM through the news hour is sponsored by asbestos lawyers and junk food.
  • The 7PM news is leased back to America by Big Pharma and the automotive industry.
  • Primetime is anybody’s ballgame.
  • The 11PM-3PM syndicated police-procedural is brought to you by phone chat lines, local car dealerships, and lousy sold-on-TV products.

It’s a good thing you’re cute, Finn, ’cause you’re kicking Papa’s ass.

Date posted: October 17, 2008 | Filed under entertainment, finn, humor | 3 Comments »

3 Responses to 24 Hours of TV Advertising.

  1. Linda says:


  2. the idiot says:

    Netflix is great, but when the baby is crying, it’s hard to hear what’s happening in the movie. Also, I like to sit and watch a movie from start to finish; Finn’s schedule doesn’t often mesh with that ideal.

  3. ren says:

    On demand? Does Comcast have that? Box sets, too…whole seasons of idiot box goodness in 47-minute intervals.