Finn got the wild idea about two weeks ago to have herself a yard sale. In typical fashion, the thought struck her on a Thursday, and she announced her plan to us to hold it the following Saturday. We quickly advised her to put it off a week for both logistical and commercial reasons: the neighborhood across the street was holding their spring yard sale this weekend, and that always gets lots of traffic.
Jen and I started making lists of stuff to drag down from the attic and up from the cellar, and by Friday night we had a sizeable stack of stuff piled on the front porch ready to go. We lucked out with good weather. I ran out to get breakfast and by 8AM we had two tables piled with goods on the front lawn flanked by furniture of all shapes and sizes. We get lots of eyeballs on Frederick Road, so the cars lined the street pretty much all morning. We said goodbye to a lot of toys, kids’ clothes, large furniture, and other stuff; Finn sold a lot of jewelry and some books. I tried to get people interested in the futon frame but nobody would bite. By 11:30 the traffic slowed so we hauled everything inside and counted our earnings: about $175 plus a ton of quarters.
As the sky got dark I went upstairs to roll a second coat of paint in the old blue room and then went down to the basement to rebuild a carburetor for the Travelall. The wind picked up and the rain came down all afternoon. Jen and I watched the first three episodes of the Mandalorian season 3 and then we all hit the hay.
At around 11:30 we heard booming and crackling very close outside, and opened a window to see one of the transformers behind our house alternately exploding in green flame and then barfing hot red lava down the side of the can. As I was looking up the I’m-not-calling-about-a-gas-leak number for BGE, our lights went out. I reported the issue and we went back to bed. In the morning our electricity wasn’t back and the estimates were saying 4PM for a return to power. Jen and I took Hazel for a long walk and then we hit the road in search of a generator.
We’ve had our fair share of electricity outages here at the Lockardugan Estate; in the first ten years we must have lost power five times. It’s been better since they replaced the transformer directly behind us (that one used to explode every time it rained) but we’ve lost an entire fridge and freezer full of food twice in the last ten years, and that shit ain’t cheap. I decided to look for a portable generator/inverter both because I didn’t want another huge object taking up space in the garage, and I also wanted something we might be able to take camping. After visiting two stores we drove to Columbia and found a nice Craftsman 2200W unit (basically a rebadged Generac) to bring home.
On the back lawn all went well until I pulled the “don’t start this without oil” tag off and looked for the manual to tell me where the oil fill was located: there was no manual. Nothing on the side of the box, and nothing on the web page for the model I’d just bought. Noting it was manufactured by Generac, I looked on their site and found what I needed. Once it was full of oil and gas it fired right up and I plugged the fridge in, and it never skipped a beat. So that’s a nice bit of insurance to have out in the garage.
What’s that little wooden box beneath the window?
Theoretically, it’s a bat box, meant for housing lots of the hungry little beasts so that they might rid us of the mosquitos that haunt our yard. In actuality, it housed a wasp’s nest, which I had to vaporize from the ladder with a can of RAID.
That air conditioner, a huge hulking beast of a machine, will come out as soon as I can get a replacement window measured and ordered. (I’d like to be able to just push it out and have it drop to the ground below, but I’l have to deal with humping it down three flights of stairs. Oh, well.)
Resale market on air conditioners must be good considering your willing to haul that thing down three flights of stairs. May I suggest putting carpet or something under it and sliding it down. It’ll be easier on your back. Nice beach shots. I hate you guys. : ^ )
Wasps inexplicably love my front porch. My hippie pest control service they said they couldn’t help me, as only “the big guns” work on wasps and scorpions.
I felt bad spraying that bigass can of RAID, but it was pretty satisfying to see those fuckers instantly fall dead to the ground.
And another thing: you should definitely push that A/C unit out instead of carrying it, and you should TOTALLY get it on video.
Ideally you’d drop it into something. I think a giant tub of green jell-o would do nicely.
Heh, heh. Yeah, all environmental and animal-friendly solutions got left on the ground when I was 35 feet in the air with a couple of wasps circling the ladder like the biplanes at the end of King Kong. Good night, gentlemen!
As for the A/C unit: I love the Jell-O idea, but unfortunately it’s perched directly over a couple hundred dollars worth of plants in Jen’s west garden, so all attempts at testing gravity that way are out.
*sigh*
I was going to ask if that was the ginormous AC unit from my apartment in CT but now I see it was one of The Doctor’s…
I’d pay half the cost of replacing the plants to watch a YouTube video of the green Jell-O displacement.
Excellent suggestion, Renie – I’ll add to the fund.
Y’all need to check with my lady–they’re her flowers.
No matter how much I love that idea, at three years (!!), the perennials are only now starting to act like they know something. So considering that I’ve put about $500 bucks into that 3′ x 2′ spot (and Renie’s poppies that she swore “will grow anywhere” died within three days), unless you’re willing to pay the ENTIRE amount of what it would cost to repopulate that spot, I’m leaning firmly toward no. I just can’t afford to keep putting money in the dirt.
Besides, I half wonder if the stupid AC wouldn’t arc in just the right way to come back through the dining room windows…THAT I would pay money to see. Because I’m sick like that.
Fuckin’ poppies.
Change of plan: Renie, myself and any other interested parties donate monies toward the purchase of a utility table, platform or some other means by which to protect the flower bed from A/C and Jell-o rain.
Works for me…and why is this beginning to seem like the beginnings of a Vonage commercial?
We’re going to need something sturdier than a folding table. More like a wooden ski ramp, starting directly under the AC unit and ending about 10″ from the house.
We could even tape skis to the bottom and recreate the “agony of defeat” guy on the old Wide World of Sports promo video. With Jell-O.